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J.R.R. Tolkien: In the Land of Stars and Stripes, the Birth of a New Meat—Crafted not from Beast, but from their very Cells

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  • A feat of enchantment it is, as the regulators of yonder United States approve the sale of meat birthed from animal cells, not the creatures themselves. Two companies of California, Upside Foods and Good Meat, are the pioneers of this marvel.
  • This new craft of meat production stands to save the animals from harm, lessen the burdens on our fair Earth, and offer a novel way to sustain our need for nourishment.
  • The process involves growing meat in steel cauldrons from cells derived from the living beasts. The shapes it takes are varied: cutlets, nuggets, sausages, and more.
  • Though more expensive it be than traditional meat, and not yet ready to grace the common marketplace, this ‘cultivated meat’ is set to debut in exclusive dining establishments.

In a time not too distant from ours, in the land of Stars and Stripes, a new chapter was being written in the great book of gastronomy. An extraordinary decree was passed by the lords of regulation, paving the way for a new kind of sustenance. No longer would it be the lot of beasts to offer their flesh for our tables. For from the very cells of these creatures was meat to be cultivated, a venture undertaken by two companies of repute, Upside Foods and Good Meat.

These pioneers, driven by the desire to spare the animals the cruel fate of the slaughterhouse and to lessen the strain on the Earth, embarked on this journey of innovation. The notion was simple, yet revolutionary: to produce meat not from the carcass of a beast, but from their very cells, nurtured in the belly of steel cauldrons.

This ‘cultivated meat’ takes various forms, from nuggets to sausages, each shaped with care to mirror their traditional counterparts. The initial samples, I am told, possess a likeness to the familiar, yet carry the promise of the unfamiliar – a paradox that might intrigue the most adventurous of palates.

One must note, however, that this new breed of meat is not yet ready to grace the common marketplace. It is a costly affair, this cultivation of cells, and the scale of production has not yet matched that of traditional meat. However, the lords of Upside and Good Meat have found a stage for their creation: exclusive dining establishments, where the curious and the adventurous might sample these offerings.

In my humble opinion, it is a curious development, this birth of meat from cells. As a scholar and a lover of lore, I am intrigued by the ways in which mankind continues to shape and reshape the world. The blending of science and food, the innovation that strives to lessen the burdens on our Earth and its creatures, is a testament to the boundless spirit of ingenuity.

However, as a creature of habit, I must confess a certain trepidation. The familiar comforts of the kitchen, the traditional ways of preparing a meal, these are deeply ingrained. While I appreciate the potential benefits of this new kind of meat, I must wonder if it will ever truly replace the familiar sizzle of a steak, the comforting aroma of a stew. Only time, as it always does, will tell.

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